Hanky is trying to get at the strawberries in the planter behind me and I’m out on the deck that we’ve furnished. He and I have been spending a lot of time out here, mainly reading, now writing (typing). Hanky loves it out here. He’s just the sweetest little muffin and I tell him all the time. Where the table is located is a little windy but it’s a beautiful day. I have nothing pressing going on at work right now. Basically, I’m waiting for the partnership forms and joint rep code to go through with Niall and then I’ll be able ot start doing some work and help him. Niall is great so far. He’s thoughtful, he speaks well and intelligently to his clients, he cares about his clients, he has a bit of a dry sense of humor and I can tell that he’s just over it right now with the minutia of the job. My thoughts are definitely on the “it’s just a job” setting. I’m grateful that Rob brought me on to the credit union, believed in me, offered me a place to be and a paycheque and opportunity for growth. I’m sad he’s retired. I wish he stayed on for another year. I have Andrea as my boss, and she’s so lovely. I told her she’s not allowed to have ambition because I always want her to be my boss. I know this is a good job, I’m super qualified, I don’t get the same satisfaction I did before the layoff and I also have much less stress so I’m willing to accept that trade off. I’m happy with my life and where it’s going. I’m reading a book now called How to Heal Your Life and it’s a simple, easy read mainly confirming my current mindset and attitude. I want to be more present. I want to enjoy the sunshine. I want to enjoy the small yet beautiful things and moments I have available to me. I keep saying I want to write, so I’m going to write more. I’m thinking of spending an hour a day writing, typing. I’m also getting up and walking each morning, even if it’s only for a half hour. I’m reading a lot more as well, watching sports on the tv. I’m listening to more podcasts over just watching tv. I’m still able to keep up with my reality shows and enjoy them but I’m not sitting on the couch for hours mindlessly watching shows I don’t care about. I still need to clean out my closet of clothes that don’t fit. I’m having a hard time there. Also, some of the clothes fit but I don’t wear them. Some of them have bad memories attached. I also still want to shed some pounds, not really for the number but because I know things aren’t fitting well and I can do better and be healthier with my body. Now that my mind and thoughts are more healthy, I believe it will trickle down to other aspects of my life such as my body. My eating will be better. I need to stop eating fried foods. We’ve booked Hawaii for October and New York for November/December so that’s going to be my motivation. I’m snacking less and also paying more attention. I’m motivated by my health. After spending this weekend with my parents and seeing how they are living day to day, I hope to be more active and in better shape when I’m their age and I believe that will be based on how I’m treating my body right now. This weekend with my parents was wild. I talked all about it with my therapist this morning and was blurting things out constantly where truly we couldn’t even de-brief. We just ran out of time, so many things happened, it was fascinating. My eyes are wide open. I’m watching how they interact, how they react, how they speak, what they say, what their actions on and I’m seeing a lot of my old self in those visions. I love my parents but I don’t always like their dynamic and I want something different. Not that there’s anything wrong with what they have, but I have my own ideas about love and how I feel about love. I’m super excited about this weekend – it’s our 5 year wedding anniversary and we are staying at the Fairmont where we stayed when we got married. We have Nightingale booked (where we got engaged) and I booked Chop for Friday night. Hanky will have so much fun, he loves the hotel and strutting through the lobby. On Wednesday, I’ll be going with Tam Tam to see the new Oakridge mall. We will check out the new Loewe and Miu Miu and Dior. Shopping is so much fun, such a good time, we love to pet the pretty things.

Gotta go!